MARRIAGE, DIVORCE AND REMARRIAGE (7): God’s Design for Marriage
When we open the sacred page and gaze upon the dawn of human life, we behold the first marriage — pure, unadorned, and heavenly in its simplicity. No choir sang. No priest spoke. No vows were rehearsed beneath the light of candles. There was only God, His creation, and two souls drawn together by His own hand.
“Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said: ‘This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.’ Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” (Genesis 2:22–24)
God Himself was the witness, the officiant, and the author of this first holy union. Adam and Eve were not joined by words but by divine act. Their covenant was written not on parchment but in the mystery of flesh and spirit. The union was not performed — it was created.
Here we see marriage in its purest form. Not ceremony, but covenant. Not ritual, but reality. It is the sacred weaving of two lives into one, ordained by the Lord of heaven and sealed by His presence.
What God joined in Eden was more than companionship; it was a reflection of His own image — two becoming one, even as the Father, Son, and Spirit are one. Every true marriage since that day is but an echo of that first divine joining.
Jacob and Leah: The Covenant in the Tent
If we allow the Bible to define marriage, we must let its narratives speak plainly. Genesis 29 tells of a strange and sorrowful joining — that of Jacob and Leah.
“And Laban gathered together all the men of the place and made a feast. Now it came to pass in the evening, that he took Leah his daughter and brought her to Jacob; and he went in to her… So it came to pass in the morning, that behold, it was Leah!” (Genesis 29:22–25)
There was a feast, but the feast was not the marriage. There was joy and wine and dancing, but the covenant was not sealed until Jacob and Leah were joined in the privacy of the tent. The darkness hid the face, but not the reality. When Jacob “went in to her,” the union was complete — and it could not be undone.
Had marriage been only a ritual, the deception could have been easily reversed. But covenant is deeper than ceremony. It is not made by men’s words but by God’s recognition of two made one.
Yet let us not mistake the act alone for the covenant. Without the heart’s intent — without the will to bind one’s life to another before God — the act becomes sin. The physical union seals what the spiritual intention has already promised. Covenant without union is incomplete; union without covenant is corruption.
This is the weight and wonder of the one-flesh bond — both beautiful and fearful. It is sacred because it reflects Christ’s inseparable union with His Church.
The Wedding at Cana: A Celebration of Covenant
In the Gospel of John, we find Christ at a wedding feast in Cana. “On the third day there was a wedding in Cana of Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there. Now both Jesus and His disciples were invited to the wedding.” (John 2:1–2)
Here, too, there is celebration — laughter, joy, and the fragrance of new love. Yet no vows are recorded, no priestly act described. What Christ blessed that day was not a ceremony, but a covenant already formed. His miracle did not create the marriage; it honored it.
By turning water into wine, Jesus sanctified the joy of union and declared that marriage, rightly entered, is a gift worthy of heaven’s smile. The feast was the outward rejoicing of an inward reality.
So it is today. A ceremony can be holy, a witness can be precious, but only God joins hearts as one. The altar may bless the covenant, but the Spirit alone seals it.
Marriage, Intention, and Covenant
From Eden to Cana, from the Garden to Calvary, one truth stands unbroken: marriage is a covenant of faithfulness between one man and one woman, joined as one flesh and blessed by God.
Sexual union, in its purity, is meant to seal that covenant — never to cheapen it. It is holy ground. To enter that act without covenantal intent is to take God’s gift and use it for sin. But when it flows from love, faith, and lifelong commitment, it becomes an altar of grace.
Paul calls it “a great mystery,” for it mirrors “Christ and the Church” (Ephesians 5:32). In marriage rightly understood, we see a picture of divine faithfulness — the Bridegroom and His Bride, joined in everlasting love.
The Role of Ceremony and Society
While Scripture does not prescribe a formal wedding ritual, it does affirm the wisdom of public covenant. A ceremony does not create the marriage, but it bears witness to the covenant before others. It honors the union, provides accountability, and protects both spouses and children.
Throughout history, societies and churches have rightly developed ceremonies and legal recognition as expressions of that covenant. These are not the source of marriage, but they are wise and good — for what God joins in private should not be hidden from the world. Love does not shrink from light; it welcomes it.
The state may record a marriage, and the church may bless it, but only God can truly join two souls as one. Yet when such joining is declared before witnesses, it strengthens both conscience and community. For even as the Lord said, “What God has joined together, let not man separate” (Matthew 19:6), He also calls us to “walk honestly” before all men (Romans 13:13).
God’s Design and Human Distortion
In our day, the holy pattern of marriage has been blurred by passion and pride. Yet the Word of God remains plain: marriage is the sacred union of male and female. The phrase “one flesh” declares both distinction and complement — the harmony of difference designed by the Creator Himself.
Two men or two women cannot become “one flesh” in the way God ordained. Their bond, however affectionate, cannot mirror the mystery of Christ and His Church. To deny this is to darken counsel without knowledge. Still, truth must be spoken with tears, not triumph — for Christ’s heart breaks for all who wander from His design.
We must hold truth and grace together. Holiness without compassion becomes cruelty; compassion without truth becomes deceit. Let us love as Christ loved — speaking with gentleness, yet never surrendering the Word of God.
Grace, Repentance, and Renewa
If hearts are wounded by this truth, let them remember that grace still flows from Calvary. Many have sinned through ignorance or rebellion — treating the one-flesh bond lightly, despising the covenant, or confusing passion with love. Yet the blood of Jesus speaks better things. “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive.” (1 John 1:9)
No life is beyond His restoration. The past can be cleansed, the covenant renewed, the heart made whole. The mercy that pardoned the thief can also heal the adulterer, the deceived, the broken.
Christ calls us not to despair but to repentance. And every repentant soul finds at His feet both cleansing and new beginning.
Walking in God’s Covenant
Marriage is not man’s invention — it is God’s creation. The first union began in Eden, and the last great union will be in glory when the Lamb receives His Bride. All earthly marriages point to that eternal mystery.
Ceremonies may honor it, feasts may celebrate it, and laws may recognize it — but God alone joins the hearts. When a man and woman come together in covenant love, intending lifelong fidelity, God Himself blesses their union.
So let us cherish purity. Let our homes become small sanctuaries of grace. Let husbands love their wives as Christ loved the Church, and let wives adorn the gospel with gentleness and strength.
Every true marriage is a sermon — a living parable of redemption. And every faithful home becomes a testimony that heaven’s design is still beautiful, still holy, still true.
May we walk humbly in that design.
May we honor the covenant God ordains.
May our love mirror His.
For “from the beginning it was not so” that man should stand alone. And from the beginning until the end, God’s design has not changed — two made one, joined by His hand, blessed by His Spirit, and kept by His grace.
Bryan Dewayne Dunaway
